One month countdown..

Just realized that my darling S turns 3 in a month!! Wow where did all the time go -- got so used to telling people 2 years, then 2 and a half, then someone was asking yesterday how old he was and I realized he's nearly 3 already !!

Will it be the end of the terrible twos.. who am I fooling.. it can sometimes lead to the even more terrible threes.. maybe I'll call it the thrilling threes and see how it goes :).. a mom can dream can't I?

Thinking of all the things I want to remember about his todder-hood so here goes

• He's such a charmer - started talking very early probably cos of big sis' influence - and uses his vocabulary and expressions completely to his benefit. Anyone who comes home falls in love with him :). In his teenage years that trait is going to worry me crazy, but right now it's very very cute !
• He's a good eater - doesn't fuss much except for "Kaaram"(spiciness) because we are very low on spice in our household. Trying to get him to a medium level of spice, so he can be ready to try all kinds of food, which I think is very important!
• He knows to identify all the letters and numbers through using a laptop that I actually bought for D. It's got different games, some of which identify the letters and numbers when the keys are pressed. We thought for a long time that he was just fiddling around and listening to the different kinds of noises, but realized later that he had actually picked up all this stuff on his own!!
• He draws the cutest smiley faces, and already knows that he must colour inside the lines! Not that he actually does it, but he knows that he's supposed to ;).
• Ability to use gadgets - I wrote a separate post on this Tech Savvy Generation - this is one aspect that amazes me more and more everyday - we recently got an iPod touch - so that the games that the kids loved on the iPhone are accessible to them even when Appa is at work - and both the kids just love it. S retains information about this so well - I showed him how to go to youtube once, and the next time I hear him telling me - I want Waka Waka - go to "U2" !! And then of course he found "U2" himself.. The day he actually learns to string together those letters and type - I'll have to start worrying about what videos he's going to find - thought I would have another 10 years before getting to that stage! But both technology and children are getting more advanced ;).
• The way he says "I love you sooo much!" at appropriate times - when he sees a soft expression on my face, or on the other hand he's done something and trying to deflect from it ;)
• How he learns to identify any car after a couple of times of our telling him what it is! He was the one who forced me to look carefully to see what is actually different about each cars, instead of just seeing the name to check what it was :).
• Baby talk - he insists on saying "Gettupping", he once tried to pronounce "Mitsubishi" and couldn't - so he said "I'm not grown up no - when I grow up I can say it!" - then in 3 days tried again and said "I'm grown up now!" :).

Oooh I'm missing the babyhood already.. On to different experiences, challenges, memories....!

Death and explaining it..

We have faced many challenges with dealing with our dear daughter.. sometimes because of my lack of patience.. and somewhere also because her personality is the type that needs a lot of nurturing and understanding.. 
I remember about a year ago when I was struggling to coming to terms with the kind of little person she seemed to be and I found this article on the net about Spirited children which really lifted my spirits :). Led to my buying a book Raising Your Spirited Child which really helped out with my patience levels and dealing with her special brand of spirit.

That was to set the context to some of my exchanges with my daughter. I try my best to set the atmosphere, prepare her for all that is going to happen, and now that she is reading so much and absorbing so much information from around here I never know what is going to come up next. This happened last evening/night:

D:    Amma, when I become a grandmother, what will you be?
Me:  Hmm.. I'll be a great grandmother darling! (Already having an idea where this is heading, and trying to deflect)
D:    But you'll be really old isn't it? Will you be dead/alive? (you get the idea - exactly what i was trying to avoid)
Me:  I don't know darling, think I might still be around. Maybe when you become a great grandmother I'll be a great-great grandmother!! But you never know, only God knows who'll be around how long! (She's too bright to fool outright, so thought I shouldn't completely ignore her concern)
D:    Seeming to accept this, just said mildly - I don't want you to die!
Me:  Foolishly thinking this is the end of it - Don't worry baby I'm not going anywhere for a long time.

Nothing more happened on the subject until it was time for her to sleep. After I tucked her in, I realized she's terribly upset and started crying - "I don't want you to die!" I tried to understand where the subject arose out of. A couple of weeks back, we went to visit a grand-uncle of my husband's in Chennai. He had just been diagnosed with a recurrence of cancer, but he was interacting normally when we met him. Unfortunately the cancer was of a galloping kind, and about a week after we met him, he passed away. I had mentioned this to D thinking she would wonder the next time we went to their house so I should tell her about it - Was I wrong in doing this - can't help but feel that way now :( !!

Took a long time to calm her down - the conversation went from I don't want you to die - I don't want appa to die - I'll be all alone - or S and I will be alone - and so on !! I tried humour (Let's tell God Amma has to be alive for ever!), Realism (You'll have your own family by then baby!), outright lying (I'll be alive for ever!), but nothing worked - she was sobbing for nearly an hour.. until finally she calmed down and I just sat by her side, till she fell asleep.

Wow Parenting just has so many more of these waiting to happen doesn't it?

If any of you have your own experience of dealing with the subject, please do share.