Whatever your style of parenting, all of us need a recharge now and again. Popularly known nowadays as ME time :). Here's how I go about it:
Set expectations early: From the time they were very young, my kids know that Amma sometimes needs her own time either with a book, or her laptop :P, and it's better to not disturb her at those times as you won't get a straight answer anyway. I think it helps to establish boundaries and not be at the beck and call of your darlings or they might grow to expect that behaviour as they grow up too ;).
Leave the familiar areas: Sometimes the only way to be alone with myself is to actually leave home and find something else to do - whether reading a book or going for a walk in the park, or visiting the neighbourhood beauty salon - a couple of hours of doing what you want or just pampering yourself does wonders! My Yoga class counts as ME time too ;).
Meet friends: I went through the usual route in FB - you come across someone you used to know well, you say hiiii we musssst meet, and then of course it never happens. With new friends and old, I think I've met a lot more in 2012 than in the previous few years. The best way is to have no expectations, just try to spontaneously set something up :). It helps that I have willing babysitters in my parents, so my coffees and lunches can be my own space.
Give time to what you love: For me it's usually gardening, for you it might be something else - makes me feel so at peace to be among my plants, it's like a complete recharge even if I've had a physically or mentally trying day. And especially with my plants, I don't even have to be alone - my kids come along sometimes to help water - it still qualifies as ME time just for the joy it gives me.
Some other attempts such as leaving the kids with their grandparents in Chennai for a couple of weeks don't seem to meet my purpose completely as I spend too much time thinking/wondering about them for it to qualify completely as ME time :O!
So what do you do for that much needed ME time? Do share your thoughts and tips too!
Posted for Week 4 theme post of the Marathon Bloggers 52 week challenge in 2013.
Nice post Aparna. Interesting how leaving the kids with grandparents in Chennai doesn't count as ME time. :-).
ReplyDeleteYeah, but I'm getting used to it so hopefully the next time ;).
DeleteNice! Setting expectations with oneself early is also important, esp as a mommy. So clearly not feeling guilty or taking time out for non-child related things is only going to ensure a happier mom and therefore, a happier family. Me-time is THAT important!
ReplyDeleteAbsolutely!! Guilt totally doesn't come into it for me ;)
DeleteI agree we as moms need to surely have the ME space !!only a happy heart can keep her kids happy.
ReplyDeleteYes Pooja :) I feel the difference in myself on those days when I haven't had my space too much.
DeleteI am still to leave the toddler over at grandparents place.. even though they keep asking.. I have a huge separation anxiety thing to enjoy without her..
ReplyDeleteThe first couple of times, I found it tough too Sirisha. But believe me, they end up having so much fun without us, it only leaves us with a bit of a "huh!" feeling ;).
DeleteI really like the first pointer. Something I guess my mother need to do a little more !
ReplyDeleteLOL Nimue, sounds like you have a close and loving relationship with your mom though :)
ReplyDeleteHi! Aparna...I came across your blog recently...I am George's junior from UC and happened to check your account because I felt that you looked very familiar. Are you from Chennai? Did you study in Fathima Matriculation HSS in Chennai? Anyways...I enjoyed going through your blog and your Green Diary! I must admit that I am not a "plants" person but I still loved going through all your pics and totally impressed with your green thumb! : )
ReplyDeleteI agree about the ME time too...I need that every now and then to recharge myself! : ))